Somebody’s blog said to make sure to update my software, so I jumped at least a full version number of WordPress today. If the site looks odd, it may be that I’m still getting used to all the new bells and whistles.
Dave Barry stopped writing his humor columns a while ago, but that hasn’t stopped the Miami Herald from reprinting old ones, dubbing them classics. The most recent one was about the Art Basel Miami Beach and mentioned Rodney McMillian’s “chair.” Clearly, Uncle Jay could have done better – and if indeed McMillian’s art was on sale for $2’800.00 then it could be a wise business investment to get Uncle Jay a gallery. I can volunteer to write the pretentious copy.
I suppose the real question is if anyone ever bought the artwork.
I’ve been silent all trip about my whereabouts and experiences, not because nothing has happened but because I have had other things to do. Maybe this weekend I can catch up a bit, but before I attempt that, there’s something that caught my attention in a news story regarding the stimulus bill.
“…there is more than $48 billion for transportation projects such as road and bridge construction, mass transit and high-speed rail.”
Yes, that sounds like a lot, but:
- Break it down per capita and you have 48’000 : 300 = US$ 160.- per person invested in all these infrastructure projects, far less than most Americans spend per year on their car.
- Compare it to the Gotthard Base Tunnel costs, which were originally estimated at about US$ 6.5 billion. I’ll round that up to 7.5 billion to simplify calculation (and because the original costs have already been exceeded past that amount). That makes 7’500 : 7.5 = US$ 1’000.- per person, or about US$ 50.- per person per year. That’s just for one single (admittedly huge) project, and one decided on without a financial crisis looming!
In my more selfish and cynical moments, I feel it’s a no-brainer to upgrade and replace road and especially rail infrastructure (which benefits everyone) instead of digging folks out of debt they owe to their poor decisions (which will benefit - even reward – the foolhardy).
Rail infrastructure, in particular, could save significant costs and (mantra warning) reduce dependence on foreign oil if it allowed people to use their cars less frequently or even use fewer cars. Of course, car purchases have already dropped and instead of relieving dependence on foreign oil have revealed our dependence on domestic car makers.
Now, having added my two cents, I propose that everyone caught blogging or commenting on this issue should pay two cents per post or comment into a stimulus bill discussion fund which will be used for funding the bill. Where do I send my cheque?
To all you artistically inclined blog readers I offer an art competition with as of yet unspecified prizes: Draw a picture with the title “Pastafarian.” Send it to thduggie [at} yahoo {dot] com. Win crazy stuff.
Deadline: My next business trip.
And no, I’m not the first to come up with that portmanteau, but until I just searched the internet I thought I was. The internet is a depressing thing.
I meant to include this picture in the last post. Instead, I now dignify it with its own, a dignity I doubt it deserves. Who can guess what this ad is for?
It wasn’t a bad day as such. We had a bit of a business discussion in the morning and went for lunch at a Chinese restaurant across the street. On the way there we passed a liquor and tobacco shop with glass doors and an English translation underneath the Chinese warning: Mend the Glass. The Chinese are far less trigger-happy than the Japanese about using English, so cute signs like that are few and far between. Most of their English use goes toward “Bank of Beijing” and such signs.
The food at the restaurant ranged from cold and vinegary to hot and spicy. The spicy chicken bits with peanuts and hot peppers contained a flowery-sweet note which came from small pepper corns. When toward the end of the meal we asked for rice, the informed us they were out of rice and would we like noodles? I’d just explained to Joe my rule of not having noodles in Asia before dinnertime, so we opted for dumplings instead.
Despite boasting upscale furnishings the toilets only boasted squat pots, and it didn’t impress me much more than rocket scientists apparently impress Shania that up the same staircase that led down to the toilet came a guy with a platter of hot dishes. Oh well, I’ve got King Creosote to back me up.
After lunch Paul and I hailed a cab and took a ride through Beijing’s sto-pan-d’go traffic back to the hotel to pick up my demonstration microscope for some training. I enjoyed that, even though it took us all afternoon just to cover basics and get everyone to change a tip. (I’d link to the wikipedia page for atomic force microscopes here, but the Chinese government has apparently decided that wikipedia is a dangerous site that needs to be blocked.) I’m still not sure they can carry out a good measurement…
The day ended with yesterday’s customer demanding that we demonstrate another measurement mode before they sign the acceptance form and pay the remainder. I feel like the car dealer whose customer pays 80% cash for his SUV and then says: “Now you demonstrate to me that my car can do what the ad promised and I’ll pay the rest.” What is it that makes Europeans and Americans alike purchase and accept our instruments without such testing? Apparently, Chinese researchers will purchase ovens they intend to use for temperatures around 100 °C but insist on seeing the oven reach the specified maximum of 240 °C before accepting it.
So, in honor of this day, here’s an ABBA sing-along:
My my, at Waterloo Napoleon did surrender
Oh yeah, and I have met my infamy in quite a similar way
The Sears catalogue on the shelf
Is singing this ditty itself
Squatterloo – I am defeated, you won the war
Squatterloo – promise to use you (can’t wait no more)
Squatterloo – couldn’t escape if I wanted to
Squatterloo – no other place for a man to poo
Squatterloo – finally straddling my squatterloo
My my, I tried another tack but that took longer
Oh yeah, and now it seems my only chance is giving up the fight
And how could I ever refuse
I feel like my bowels are loose
Squatterloo – I am defeated, you won the war
Squatterloo – promise to use you (can’t wait no more)
Squatterloo – couldn’t escape if I wanted to
Squatterloo – no other place for a man to poo
And how could I ever refuse
I feel like my bowels are loose
Squatterloo – I am defeated, you won the war
Squatterloo – promise to use you (can’t wait no more)
Squatterloo – couldn’t escape if I wanted to
Squatterloo – no other place for a man to poo
Squatterloo – finally straddling my squatterloo
I tried to check how much the beer from the mini bar was, but the hotel guide folder only has two pages worth of how much it is to damage items in the room. The thermos comes pretty cheap at 40 RMB; the mattresses at 400 RMB practically invite a person to try and wedge them out the window just to see a mattress fall from the fourth floor to the dusty Beijing ground.
However, all the articles we provide in your room are for use only, if you want to take it away, please contact with the Duty Manager in the Lobby. Too bad, I wouldn’t have minded a safe box for 750 RMB. (I checked: the safe box is fixed to the floor anyway.)
I just got rid of 29 pairs of socks and 1 pair of boxer shorts. The world needs to know this stuff.
In case you were wondering how it is to give up alcohol for Lent, here are some things I’ve noticed:
- It simplifies my life. I don’t have to worry about opening a bottle or not, and what to do with it in a one-person ménage once open. I don’t have to worry about wine selection for dinners or about which bottle to buy in the store.
- It’s surprisingly easy. I don’t experience cravings or nearly slip up. The only time I consumed alcohol was in a chocolate praline by accident.
- Other things would be way harder to give up, but maybe it’s like exercise: I need to build up the muscles of self-discipline. If I can’t manage the Taipei Sheraton buffet, I’ve still got a long way to go. So next year: buying books and CDs? Myspace? E-mail?
- I realize that it’d be harder to give up e-mail than to give up going to church, at least in my Gedankenexperiment. What does that say about priorities?
- Nobody really needs alcohol, but I’m looking forward to Easter. Maybe fewer but better bottles should be my next step?
So, hello world. That had to be said.
Then, let’s add an image:
Finally, let’s see if Japanese characters work. おはよう、世界ちゃん。
That’s it for today!